Do you have self respect? We aren’t talking about an over inflated mob boss, street punk type of respect. We’re talking about having the same respect for yourself as you would for anyone else.
There are many people who regularly talk down to themselves. They use language and berate themselves in ways they would never think of applying to another human being. This lack of self appreciation for oneself is destructive and demeaning.
The sad part is, if you ask any of these people if they think they are too hard on themselves, they would probably say no! They probably would even tell you they are not hard ENOUGH on themselves, and start beating themselves up all over again right then and there!
If you catch yourself saying things to yourself like “Stupid!” or “Why do you always screw things up!” or “Look at all that ugly fat!” - stop right there and ask yourself if you would consider it respectful to say those things to someone else.
Often it is self hatred or loathing that subconsciously makes you feel you are worth nothing, and your inner voice reinforces these beliefs. Don’t let misplaced guilt or shame force you towards the belief that you do not deserve respect!
Once you start to come to terms with the whole you, both the good and the bad, you can start praising yourself for the things you do right and working on the things you get wrong. Then you can honestly say you are worthy of your own respect, and start standing up to yourself, FOR yourself.
Next time you start to come down on yourself, hold off and reexamine why you feel you need a talking to. Instead of saying “Why didn’t you remember to pick up the dry cleaning? You never do anything right!”, pretend that you are talking to a child or a coworker, and say “Looks like you forgot the dry cleaning today. I know you were extremely busy, and it slipped your mind. What can we do to make sure you won’t forget it tomorrow?”
Once you start treating yourself with the same respect you show others, you will start feeling worthy of it. You can work on the problem areas in your life without being judgmental or talking down to yourself, and you will finally be able to regain your self respect. You deserve it!